He is beyond satire

Mangeur de hot-dogs

Olga Neuwirth has composed an opera, “Monster’s Paradise”, with a libretto written by her and Elfriede Jelinek. You can see in the photo above, what it’s about. It is premiering at the Hamburg Opera, before going to Zurich and Vienna, and on their website there’s a two-minute video that gives a sense of what to expect. The creators say it is inspired by the Grand Guignol, and the 1896 play by Alfred Jarry, “Ubu Roi.” But any production must stand on its own, and here the mistake is thinking you can make political satire featuring Donald Trump. Though I’m not quite sure he is the actual target here…

The Associated Press reports:

Chorus members dressed as zombies and roamed the foyers before the opera and during the intermission, along with Disney-styled princesses and dancing hot dogs.

Why though? Trump has certain tastes in women, but Disney-styled princesses are not it. Famously, he loves McDonald’s, but that’s nothing to do with hot dogs. [Canadian content digression: Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau was annoyed with Quebec Premier Robert Bourassa and on camera called him un “mangeur de hot-dogs” [sub-digression: my dad said that at Montreal Expos games the vendors in the aisles would offer “chien-chaud” - this needs further research]].

The President-King entered in a gilded Oval Office with a Coca-Cola filled refrigerator.

You can see the fridge in the picture above. This is a double-fault. One: famously, he only drinks Diet - they’ve stocked with the wrong drink. Two: famously (again!) IRL he has a button on his desk that summons a valet who brings him a can of Diet when he is thirsty - it’s a gag he likes to show guests to the Oval Office.

Vampi and Bampi, a pair of pun-prone vampires sung by Sarah Defrise and Kristina Stanek, are avatars of the authors during five scenes that unfold over 2 hours, 45 minutes…

Good God.

Mickey and Tuckey, the President-King’s adjutants sung by countertenors Andrew Watts and Eric Jurenas, were patterned after Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg…

Trump has his “Adjutants”, to be sure, but that’s not how I would frame these two men.

The President-King boasts of winning “Ohoho” and “Tuxus,” and his lead in “Pennsilfania” isn’t even close. …

Charlotte Rampling, in several projected videos, portrays a character called The Goddess who defends nature and civilization.

Well, she didn’t save us from this.

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It doesn’t work - it can’t work. He is just not a person who lends himself to satire. Alec Baldwin could get a few laughs on Saturday Night Live because he did short skits and is a gifted comedian and knew how to keep the temperature low, but that is maybe the one partial success. Trump-as-baby has nowhere to go, and 2 hours and 45 minutes is a long time to go nowhere.

Wearing Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy masks, the vampires attack The President-King with sledgehammers and saws, which have no impact.

Again, why? For the same reason there are Cokes and Disney princesses and hot dogs - the opera is about the vulgarity and stupidity of Americans.

But if that’s what you really want to talk about, if you think you have something to say about the US, maybe find a different angle? Over 77 million people voted for him in 2024, and they weren’t all hot-dog eaters, and they live on almost every street in the country, and there have to be interesting ways to try to capture how one or another of them came to believe that things in this country were so dire as to need someone like Trump as president. You could make it dramatic, you could make some comedy, you could do lots of things (personally, I would pay real money to watch a one-act two-hander of Mike Pence getting dressed to go to Trump’s second inauguration while his wife Karen insists on staying home).

But Trump in a diaper is old and boring and lazy, and has never been funny, and has never been profound.